In my last moments
by Psychometry
Summary: Kamijou Touma is dying. There is nothing he can do about it. He awakes in a hospital and knows that he is dying even if he doesn't want to consider that a possibility. What will he spend his final moments doing? Touma x Mikoto


"Can't you do anything!? You can't let him die! There has to be something you can do!"

My eyes slowly opened to the sound of a female voice. It was one that I recognized as I had heard it every day for over three months.

"I'm doing all I can. Right now, we need to see what hap-"

The man who was talking was cut off by the girl.

"We can't just wait! That's the point! I don't… I can't… I don't want Touma to die!"

I blinked and my vision started to come into focus. There was a light on the ceiling above me. I could hear the beeps of machinery next to me.

After blinking a few more times, my senses sharpened some. I was laying down on a bed.

"Is this… a hospital?" I tried to say those words, but nothing came out.

"There's a limit to how much we can do for him. If it was within my ability to break that limit, I would."

I turned his head to the side slowly. It hurt. It hurt a lot. My vision blurred, but I blinked a few times and was able to focus again.

I saw the machinery next to the bed. From looking at the various machines, it was easy to tell that I was in a hospital. But why? Did something happen?

Slowly, I moved my head to look at the two people in the room besides me.

One was a girl that had been living with me for a while. The other was a doctor that I had met several times after serious injuries.

Suddenly, I was aware of something on my face. It was an oxygen mask.

I tried to lift his arm, but an immense pain shot through my body, so I gave up on that.

As I watched the two argue, I continued to try to speak until something finally came out.

"I… Index…"

The two immediately stopped arguing when they heard the weak voice.

They both turned to look at me.

"Touma!" Index smiled brightly and went to give me a hug, but the doctor stopped her.

"Please refrain from putting any stress on his body. He is in critical condition."

"Mirror…" I said, unable to get an entire sentence out. Something must have happened. I wanted to see myself.

The doctor grabbed a mirror that was hanging on the wall of the bathroom and brought it out, facing it towards me.

I was shocked at what I saw. All of my body that I could see was covered in bandages. There were dark red spots on some of them where I had previously been bleeding, probably due to moving around while I was asleep.

My face was relatively undamaged, but I had a white patch over my left eye that was held on with strings.

"Wha… What…?" My throat hurt when I tried to speak and when I tried to lift my arm once again, the pain shot through me, worse than before.

"Don't try to move." The doctor said. "We don't need any of your wounds reopening."

I swallowed and managed to speak.

"What happened?"

"If only I knew." The doctor said. "This girl dragged you to the front of the hospital in this condition."

I looked at the girl.

She looked at the doctor.

"Hey…" I said, taking my time with my words. "Can you give us some privacy?"

"Very well. Just don't strain yourself."

He checked the machines and wrote something down on a clipboard before leaving the room.

My eyes drifted to the girl. It was Index. Of course it was Index. I didn't expect to see anybody else by my side when I first woke up in a hospital.

I took a sharp breath that hurt my lungs before trying to speak again.

"Index."

I managed to get out that word.

"What is it, Touma?" She said, clearly worried. I felt bad for making her worry so much.

I took my time before trying to speak as I already knew that it would be painful.

"What… happened?"

She looked down for a second, then looked up with a sad smile.

"You got hurt protecting what you care for."

What I care for? What is that supposed to mean?

"What…?" I tried to get an entire sentence out, but it was to no avail. The pain got greater as I spoke, so I stopped after the first word.

"You really don't remember?" She asked. A tear fell down her face. "You protected that girl."

That girl…? Does she mean…?

"Misaka…?"

"That's right. It was foolish of her to think she could take on the magicians that tried to kill you. We probably could have handled them ourselves, but you jumped in to take the hit for her." Tears fell freely from her eyes and I felt sad just looking at her.

I felt a sudden surge of strength. I sat up in bed.

Index gasped and tried to push me back down, but I resisted.

"Index…" I said, turning to look at her. If felt as though I would pass out from the pain but I didn't show it on my face. "Don't cry."

That only seemed to make her cry more and I was at a loss. I moved my arms around her and hugged her. It was all I could think to do.

"Please. I'll be out of here soon. So take care of the place for me while I'm in here, okay?"

"Yes…"

I laid back down after that and we talked for a while. I had to stop eventually because my throat wouldn't allow anymore words to come out or at least wouldn't let me complete a long sentence.

By that time, visiting hours were over anyway.

Index and I said our goodbyes and she headed home with a smile on her face.

What is this feeling, though? I feel as if… I lied to her.

My gaze was drawn to the machines next to me. Several wires went from the machine to my arms.

This time was different. I had never been so seriously injured. Would I really stand up and leave this place soon? Would I go back to my dorm and live life as I always have? Would Index and I get caught up in something by the Magic Side again? Would I run into Biribiri on the street again and have her chase me for an hour over something trivial?

I requested some food and a nurse brought it to me a while later. My appetite wasn't that good, but I managed to eat a few slices of an apple and drank a small cup of milk along with several glasses of water.

It made my throat feel better. If only I could speak as well as I could now earlier when Index was here.

I laid down once again. I was tired and couldn't sit up anymore. There was a pain in my back when I tried to. Most of my energy had been spent talking to Index and I didn't have much left. For some reason though… I didn't want to go to sleep. There was a feeling of worry in me.

I knew it at that moment.

I, Kamijou Touma, was dying.

Hours later, I still lay awake in bed. There was nothing to do when I couldn't even move without being in pain, so I just lay there, reminiscing on the past. I hear that people do that when they're about to die. I guess it's true.

The door to my room opened slowly. It hurt, but I turned my head to see who it was. I was surprised.

It was Misaka Mikoto.

"Misaka…?"

My voice seemed to startle her as if she had not expected me to be awake.

"Kamijou…" She walked up to my bed and looked down at me.

She wasn't wearing her Tokiwadai uniform. Instead she wore long pants and a brown coat that covered to her knees. A pink scarf was around her neck.

"I'm glad to see you're okay." I said. Speaking was easier now, but I still couldn't sit up with an immense amount of pain.

There was silence for a while. She didn't say anything for a while.

"Thank you…" Misaka said, her cheeks gaining a red tint. "You really saved me… but maybe it wasn't for the best."

"What are you talking about? I did what I thought was right. Saving you was the right thing to do. I'm adamant about that."

"Kamijou, have you even seen the state you're in? You can barely move. I'm surprised that you can even speak."

She seemed to be on the verge of tears so I was trying to be careful with what I said.

"It was worth it." I said and that seemed to surprise her. "If it means that you're fine, then it was worth it."

A tear fell down her cheek.

"Idiot…" She mumbled. "It's my fault that you're like this… Why aren't you angry at me?"

What was she talking about? Her fault?

"What do you mean? If anything, it's my own fault. I was the one who decided to take the hit."

"Idiot!" She said, louder. She calmed herself enough to keep her voice down. "If I hadn't been there in the first place… If I hadn't decided to help… Then this wouldn't have happened to you."

"You were also just doing what you thought was right. Nobody can blame you for that."

"That's not the point! It's because of me that you… you…" She turned and ran out the room.

"Misaka…"

Right after she left, the doctor walked in.

"I see that you get some interesting visitors."

"I suppose you could say that." I replied. "So, why are you visiting me so late then? I didn't expect to get checked on at this time."

"I had some news and I figured that you should know immediately."

The tone of his voice. The way he spoke. The choice of words. I knew what it was.

"I'm… going to die, aren't I?"

The doctor nodded.

"I'm very sorry. There is nothing we can do at this point. Your internal injuries go far beyond what we can fix with medical technology."

I didn't feel worried or sad when he confirmed my thought.

"How long do I have?" I asked.

He looked at the time on a clock on the wall.

"I'd say about five hours. No more than that though."

"…"

Five hours, huh? I never thought that I would be told that I only had a certain amount of time left to live. I always figured that if I died at a young age it would be in some battle against an esper or a magician.

I didn't expect this. Of course, I didn't regret it either. I had sustained these injuries protecting someone dear to me.

Now I knew what I had to do with this time.

I sat up.

"Kamijou? You can't get up right now."

"Just try to stop me."

I stood and when I did, pain shot through every part of my body. If felt as if someone was tearing me apart from the inside with magic or that I had been poisoned with something and it was just now starting to kill me in the most painful way possible.

I staggered from the pain, but managed to keep straight. I grabbed a roll of gauze from a nearby table. After pulling out the wires, I wrapped the areas in gauze to stop the bleeding. Not that it really mattered, but I couldn't afford to faint from blood loss. I looked down and noticed I was still in my school uniform. I suppose they didn't want to risk hurting me by trying to get me out of it.

"I'll be going then." I said to the doctor and staggered out of the room.

The doctor didn't say anything, but sighed.

Normally a doctor wouldn't just have let me leave like that. Was it because I was dying? I hadn't thought about it.

The only thought that went through my mind was that I had to find that girl. I had to find Misaka.

I half-ran, half-staggered out of the hospital. The pain was so intense that I collapsed across the street from the hospital.

My breathing was heavier than before, but I couldn't give up yet. Using every bit of strength, pushing my body to its limits, I got up and continued running.

It was the middle of winter, so it was cold outside. I could see my breath as I ran. I wasn't exactly dressed properly for this either.

"Misaka…" I mumbled.

I still pushed on. I still continued, even through that freezing temperature.

It hurt. Every step I took hurt. Every step I took made me want to just stop. There was no way I could do that, though. There was no way that I would give up. After all that I had been through, there was no way I was going to die without seeing her again. I needed to talk to her again. I needed to tell her that it wasn't her fault.

I don't know how long I wandered through the city for. My cellphone was still in my pants pocket and the time said 3:20. It was still dark out of course and there weren't many people out. I'm sure if it had been during the day, somebody would have stopped me and tried to get me back to the hospital. It was good that it was night. I wouldn't have time for that. I didn't have much time left.

Suddenly, I knew it. I knew where Misaka was.

I turned around and started running again. It was just a feeling, but it didn't hurt to see if it was right. It was the first place I had actually talked to her at. It was the first place we had fought and I had a feeling it would be the last place we would meet.

The bridge had just come in sight. I staggered over to it, exhausted. My body couldn't take much more. It had already reached its limits.

"Misaka…"

There she was. I knew she would be here.

Misaka was there, her arms on the railing, looking out over the city.

I approached her and she turned when she heard my footsteps. I must have looked like I was almost dead already to her.

"What… are you doing here?" She asked.

"I came to see you." I said.

"You… idiot!" She yelled at me. "You're practically dying and you're going to come out in this weather to see me!? You could die you know!"

"I know."

"Then…!"

"But still…" I said. "I needed to see you. Even if was just one more time, I needed to see you again."

Misaka looked like she was on the verge of tears again. Electricity sparked around her head.

"Kamijou, you idiot… You idiot!"

She grabbed the electricity from her head and threw it at me, making that concentrated beam of electricity that I had seen numerous times. It hurt, but I put my right hand up. The electricity was negated. I started walking toward her.

"Idiot! Idiot! Idiot!"

She continued to throw electricity at me, but I negated it every time, just continuing on my way toward her.

"Why are you doing this for me!? Why!? I'm the one who got you hurt like this and you're…!" She shot more electricity, but again it was negated by my right hand.

"I don't have much time left! Just let me speak to you!"

I was close to her now.

"What do I have to do to make you stop!?" She yelled. "I don't want to hurt you anymore! It's my fault that you're like this! I can't…!"

I was very close now.

"Just go back! You'll die if you stay out in this weather! Hurry and go back!"

She reached into her pocket and took out an arcade coin.

Misaka started to hold her arm up, but I was faster. I sprinted the last few feet to reach her and wrapped my arms around her.

The coin fell from her hand and the sound of it hitting the ground was loud in the silence.

She slumped down and I fell to my knees to stay with her. I could hear her sobbing. I pulled back enough to look at her and, sure enough, tears streamed down her cheeks.

"Why…? Why… aren't you angry at me? Why… are you doing this for me?"

I had spent the entire time looking for her thinking about that. Why was I not angry at her? That was easy. She had been doing what she thought was right. Why was I doing this for her? Was it to tell her that it's not her fault? Or…

"Mikoto." I said. "I love you."

A snowflake fell from the sky and slowly descended, landed on the bridge. It was followed by thousands more that slowly started to drift down.

The tears had stopped, but she was now looking at me with shock.

I had realized it. That was the reason that I had come for her. That was the reason I wanted to comfort it. It was because I had felt that way for a long time.

"I…"

She started to speak. I could see her breath.

Her face was red, but she seemed more confident when she finally said it.

"I love you too."

My heart felt warm at those words. It was as if it was the middle of spring now.

I leaned towards her and she did the same.

Our lips met.

My heart was racing. I had never been in love before, so I had never felt this.

We stayed like that for a bit before separating.

Misaka hugged me, burying her face in my chest, trying to hide her blush.

"Touma, you idiot..."

I laughed.

It was strange that I could laugh in that situation. I was dying and there was nothing I could do about it. Despite that, I had laughed.

"Mikoto." I said. She pulled away some and looked at me. "I need you to be strong when I'm gone."

Tears fell down her face again.

"I don't want you to die, Touma."

"I don't want to leave you." I said. I slumped against her, my strength having left me. "It looked like I used too much energy though."

"Touma…"

She moved back some and let my head rest on her lap.

"It was fun, Mikoto." I said. "All those times we talked, even the times we were fighting. They were all fun because I was with you. I hadn't realized it until now, but… I was happiest when I was with you."

"It's the same for me." She said, managing to smile. "I was always so happy when we would fight. It was just an easy excuse to spend time with you. I could never say my feelings."

"It's okay." Touma said. "I'm glad that we were able to tell each other our feelings."

"Me too." Mikoto said

The first rays of sunlight started to show in the sky. I must have been running for longer than I thought.

I smiled at the girl and reached up, wiping away her tears.

"Don't be sad." I said. "Even if I'm gone, you still have friends that care about you."

She nodded.

"I'll never feel the same way about somebody as I do for you though." She said.

The sun peaked over the horizon.

"I love you, Mikoto."

"I love you, Touma."

I felt a sense of relief now.

I closed my eyes.

My world faded to black. I was glad the last thing I saw was Mikoto's face.

* * *

**I hope you guys enjoyed this short story.**

**So, here's an explanation. This is just a short story to hold you guys over. I've been piled with a lot of school work so I haven't had much time for writing. I had the idea for this fic during class so I spent about an hour writing it. I promise that I'll have the next chapter for the Ever-changing World out soon, so please be patient with me.**


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